Dean & DeLuca Invitational 5.28.17

Day IV. THE STACHE IS BACK. My buddy Jerry who missed last year made a glorious return and we are today's image. You hopefully can clearly see why Jerry is referred to as the stache. Short for mustache. He told me his children have never seen him without it.

So, you tuned in for the complete update and I am truly sorry for the delay. I hung around longer than planned, much longer than in the past and I drank some of the free beer because I missed the lunch and the finish was spectacularly close & exciting.

HEY, WAIT A MINUTE. YOU SAID THEY WERE ‘IN THE CAN’. WHAT’S UP WITH THAT ?

That’s the truth. Entries for each day were in late draft stage and need a little more work. You know Virginia that I post nothing BEFORE its time or is THEE Best it can be. So shut up por favor.

But that said, I want to dwell here now & expand on the scorers. This years collection was the best ever. I’ll start with a brief history & description of the job and move into each daily assignee in chronological order being as brief as possible as I MUST make the proverbial ‘dish-to-pass’ for work tomorrow and other assorted domestic chores that at this stage, in this phase and in this condition I simply cannot delegate or pawn off onto anyone else or another. Like that idiot Sanchez.

The scorer counts & records the players score on each hole but also gathers & collects all sorts of other data that is massaged into PGA Tour statistics by huge & powerful number-crunching computers, software & geeks mostly for the simpletons that play in fantasy golf leagues or watch intently on the telly.

It is an important job and the scorer & standard bearer, in this case yours truly, work as a team and must be careful to maintain a pace with the players and position(s) relative to the players so as not to distract or interfere with play.

Wednesday for the pro-am, my scorer was Karen. A fair-skinned red head, her accent was a slow drawl which was nothing short of soothing and smoooth. She played and knew the games finer points but this was either her first or second year so she was a little nervous. She did fine and we had a nice round chatting & telling stories around the ‘work’ or better said tasks at hand.

On Thursday, The first round of the tournament proper, Courtney was my scorer. This was her 4th or 5th year for scoring. A classic millenial, we started walking & chatting and every question she asked and I answered the answer was ‘awesome’ or ‘that’s awesome’. I tried not to let it annoy me but eventually I withdrew from extended conversations and we separated more frequently which is fine and not all that unusual.

What she did that WAS exceptional and most impressive was when each player finished out each hole, she would make eye contact and we would flash finger signs to communicate their score for the hole. She did this so well, each & every time that it made the tasking both easy and efficient. I had wondered why this method wasn’t applied in the past I axed myself.

The second round of the tournament I had a repeat from a year or two ago. Chaney was 25, played on the TCU women’s golf team AND was a member at CCC. Since our first time she had graduated, was now working as an intern for the North Texas PGA and had cut back severely on her playing & practicing.

We engaged in a lively running or rolling conversation and about midway thru the back nine we were about talked out and the awkward silence was about to set in when I axed if she had brothers & sisters.

Here is where her sense of humor sparkled.

She had two older brothers. One was a funeral director and the other a CPA. OK ?

Quipping that the only things certain in life were death & taxes, her Family had both bases covered. I still chuckle at that. The marvelous FW humor. It must be something in the water.

Anyway, she filled me in on each of their girlfriends, how she didn’t like this one and why that one was cool.

On 15, she was talking to a white shirt, a committee chairperson who I later found out was her Dad. He brought me a small bottle of water and spoke to me for a bit and I was slightly short of shocked as he was so nice. I mean not even marshalls who are supposed to ask if we walkers would like or need a water and don’t ax due to ignorance or just plain lazy so when someone does make an offer of a small bottle of water, when you want & need a water, it is or was starteling. As I said an officer of rank no less. I met him later & complimented him on his daughter and that was a most pleasant exchange as well.

She was six years younger than my daughter and only 21 years older than my GRANDdaughter to frame and put things into a proper perspective.

Recall I was off Saturday so the next scorer was Sunday.

Lin (or Lynn ?) introduced herself on the first tee, number 10 for us this round, and she seemed pleasant enough. Things quickly went south as she proceeded to tell me all about her standard bearer from the day before.

OK.

We all make mistakes I am thinking. It turns out it WAS JERRY !!

Well, on the second or third hole she messes up the score and for a few anxious minutes my numbers are flying and falling on the ground, there is confusion with names and I am thinking maybe it really was NOT the standard bearer at all but the scorer causing the issue(s).

Anyway, we got things settled down and we proceeded with a spirited and fun running chat of lively banter and chatter that was at times very funny, at times marginally inappropriate which could have been in another context steamy, crude and perhaps lewd.

Lin was a flight attendant for a major airline and we talked about that. She had professional insight into the two most recent current events on United and the ‘mother’ disrupted on the other flight. It turns out the doctor on the United flight was on the ‘no fly list’ for Lin’s airline and the mother of twins was known to do the SAME thing stirring up litigious issues and settling things out of court for significant sums of money. Unbelievable.

We ended up and had a couple of beers watching the finish. I gave her a card and some of my art marketing material and then messed up big time. I got no contact information from her.

YOU DUMMY !!

I was thinking she might be fun to see again and do something with but I closed that door on my foot.

I was drafting a plan to see if dinner might fit but that plan didn’t get traction.

We seemed to hit it off reasonably well and from the intel I gathered she was available.

Parting I got a nice hug and thought I was going to have an accident but did manage to maintain composure.

The awkwardness of my social skills returned. I was at a complete & total loss and could only babylon out ‘see you next year.’

What a shame I wasn’t a little bit crisper, sharper and quicker with something to keep the window ajar.

Oh well. The story of my life continues. Who knows. Perhaps she will read this and reach out.

Worst case I will press on. Next year who knows. Much can happen, anything can happen.

GOLF:TOURNAMENT WRAP-UP

Almost forgot the Mission.

Kevin Kisner is the winner & new champion edging out local favorite Jordan Speith by one shot. Danny Lee made a move Sunday and finished strong at 273 (-7). Scott Piercy 274 (-6) for Mr Personality himself. Paul Casey finished in the top 10 tied at 276 (-4). Grahme McDowell well back T29 finishing 280 (E) level par. Thin this year for populating the final leader board but still & always a fun time.

I got to water plants, unload & unpack Silver, make the cole slaw for tomorrow. I think I have a mild case of trench foot, jungle rot or maybe just a waterlogged set of toes. They got soaked and they feel pinched and uncomfortable. NOT painful just an annoying little stabbing when I stand up or walk.

Should make an interesting day tomorrow if the care & first aid do not yield any lessening of the condition.

And I can now crash in my own bed. For the first time in nearly a week.

Get up early, get back to the grind.

Reality returns.